Small Town - Love vs Unlove

Last Thursday I hopped on the C-train at Anderson and rode it down to the 4th street stop downtown. It wasn't until Thursday that I felt I had become 'uncitified'. I guess for me living in a small town has somewhat sheltered me. I don't see homeless people daily, let alone anyone asking for money outside the grocery store. I don't see babies and/or small children under dressed for the cold weather. Or mothers who look uncomfortably cold while pushing a stroller because she too is under dressed. The realistic picture painted before me on Thursday made me feel nauseated. Sad. Uncomfortable and guilty. I was warm. I was dressed appropriately for the cold. I was sipping a Starbucks coffee while checking messages on my iPhone. I was a silent observer in the crowd. Sadly enough, I was looking forward to coming back to our small town. Back to my shelter and away from that reality. The baby and mother that I saw waiting by the train downtown haunts me. I can't seem to let it go and it really does make me sad. Not sure what I'll do about it yet...feeling guilty that I maybe should have done something then.

On another note I need to vent a bit.

Living in a small town has made me really appreciate the friends I have and the support I can fall on when/if in need. Even though living in a small town has come with its definite advantages and perks it does come with a range of negativity. Over the past week my ears have been witness to a few 'semi-discreet' opinions and statements that make me really frustrated inside. First off because it involves those I value, respect and trust. Second, it is really no ones business to discuss especially when they don't know the other person involved AT ALL (other than the version of which they've been given). It really makes me take a glance around and question:
Who I can trust? I mean really really trust!!!
Who I can call a 'true' friend?
Who do I respect? Who respects me?
Because all that can change in a conversation or a simple statement made in less than 30 seconds. Now I know I'm not perfect. I can't say I have never ever been a part of gossip but within the last year or so I feel like I have developed an awareness that maybe I didn't have before. An awareness I may have ignored that has now become so bright I can't not notice. And the last week has showed me that opinions are out there...they are circulating...they are constant. When you hear them you have to make a split second choice to either go with it...or STAND UP for what you know is right for you. I made my choice...maybe not aloud but I made a choice. I see myself as a GOOD FRIEND and as a result I have GOOD FRIENDS. I know who they are...and they know who I am. That is what matters...
In a small town you need good friends because lets be honest, the sh*t that flies around...
...in rumors...
...in opinions...

Is exactly that (sh*t)!

That's all I got.